QUEER WORD
WHAT ARE THE FUNNIEST GAY BAR NAMES?

Go to most big cities and you’ll stumble upon gay bars with names like The Eagle or Rainbow Lounge.

But, which cities can boast to have smuttily named bars like 3-Legged Cowboy or Head Hunters?

This list celebrates the creative (and deeply unserious) bar owners the world over who have made bold, bold decisions when naming their venues. The kind of places that you can’t quite believe until you’ve seen them for yourself.    

But, first, an apology…

Compiling this list has exposed how… well… puerile my sense of humour is…

If that’s not your thing then this list isn’t going to be for you.

But, if you love the lewd and the ludicrous then strap yourself in for some giggle-worthy names!

And, yes, these were all genuine, real-life places.

And, no, I don’t know how some of them got away with it either!

Oh, if you’re into this sort of thing, you might enjoy the funniest lesbian bar names

Quick Jump

• Manhandler Saloon

• The Sausage Factory

• The White Swallow

• Mabel’s Beauty Shop and Chainsaw Repair

• 3 Legged Cowboy

• Manhole

• Pecker’s

• CC Blooms

• The Beaver

• lüb

• Ramrod

• Meu C* que Brilha

• Head Hunters

• R7

• JR.’s

  • Manhandler Saloon

Manhandler Saloon

Manhandler was a Chicago institution, open for 40 years before closing in 2020. 

And in that time it lived up to its name many times over, with a dark room in the back of the bar providing ample opportunities for… well… handling men!

The Sausage Factory

Not actually a gay bar — but it’s located in the historic LGBTQ district of the Castro, so it holds a special place in local queer lore.

And, it has a legitimate reason for being named The Sausage Factory! It’s not just a dirty name that’s sprung from someone’s smutty mind!

Before it was a restaurant, the building used to be an actual, real-life sausage factory. 

Who even knew those were a thing?

The White Swallow

Filth. 

Absolute filth.

Apparently there is a long tradition of gay bars named after a colour + a bird (think Blue Crow or Red Swan). But if you pause on White Swallow for a second and remember… certain white bodily fluids… and the age-old question of whether one chooses to spit or swallow…

Yeah. There’s definitely a double meaning here.

Mabel’s Beauty Shop and Chainsaw Repair

If the campy name wasn’t enough to hook you, how about the strange antics of the bar’s owner?

The bar, which was in Birmingham, Alabama, was unfortunately the scene of a grisly unsolved robbery-murder on January 3, 1989. As well as stealing cash from the register, the robber shot and killed bartender David Painter.

Rather than take the proper time to mourn the bar reopened the very next day. To add to the strange decision making they decided to mark the occasion by offering a special on Bloody Marys.

Maybe they just had a really dark sense of humour?

Soon thereafter the bar closed, but the owner went on to open the equally brilliantly named Eunice Crabtree’s Cut Rate Delicatessen & Bait Shop. 

3 Legged Cowboy

Get this, instead of having a disco ball in this Altanta, Georgia bar, they have a disco saddle.

That’s right – a horse saddle covered in mirrored discs that spins above the dance floor, reflecting light on the bar’s revellers. 

That’s almost as good as the bar’s dirty name, evoking a well-endowed cowboy. 

Manhole

Now, this was one of those good old fashioned gay bars – dark, dingy, sweaty and gritty.

And, with an enforced ‘no-dress’ code, it was never long before other patrons in this Chicago nightclub saw your manhole (ok, that was a terrible joke. I’m sorry). 

Pecker is US slang for penis.

That’s it. That’s the joke.

I know it’s not sophisticated, but it gets the job done. 

CC Blooms

All you need to know about this bar in Edinburgh, Scotland, is that it shares a name with Bette Midler’s character in the 1980s melodrama Beaches.

Yes, you read that correctly. The bar is named after a Bette Midler character (and, sure, Mayim Bialik if we’re including the flashback scenes).

Could it get any camper?

The Beaver

The Beaver was a dive bar in Toronto, Canada, that catered to a more alternative crowd. 

Oh, and, as for why it’s funny – see the entry for The Pecker above. 

Sophisticated it may not be, but naming your bar after a slang word for vagina is a winner in my eyes. 

lüb

The genius of this name is that, by simply adding an umlaut (those two dots above the u), the bar is at once trashy AND classy.

That’s quite a feat.

Alas, Torontonians weren’t quite as excited by a bar named after lubricant, and the bar closed in the mid-00s. 

Ramrod

Now, this is a somewhat dated reference, so in order to illustrate how funny it is let’s have a look at the dictionary definition of ‘ramrod’:

A ramrod is a metal or wooden device used with muzzleloading firearms to push the projectile up against the propellant.

So, translating for a gay context, the bar’s name is referencing butt stuff. Who doesn’t love butt stuff?

Unfortunately, this Boston institution closed in 2020, a victim of gentrification in the city. 

Meu C* que Brilha

Depending on which translation you trust, this São Paulo bar name means either:

• “My arsehole that shines,” or

• “My c*** that shines.”

Either way, locals often went with the less explicit acronym: MCQB.

Head Hunters

This is one of those occasions where I’m not sure the owners were even in on the joke.

An upscale, tropical-themed spot targeted at older gays, it had exposed beams, bamboo furniture, and enough plants to make you feel like you were flirting in a conservatory.

And yet. Head Hunters.
Sure. Absolutely. Innocent. Completely above board.

R7

It took me a little while to get this one.

If you too are struggling it might help to say it out loud.

R7.

R-7.

Arrr. Seven.

Arse. Heaven.

Get it now?

JR.’s

This is one for fans of kitschy 80s soap operas. 

The name, in and of itself, is not that interesting.

It becomes mildly amusing when you learn that the bar is named after the main character in Dallas, a popular prime-time soap opera from the 80s. 

It’s not until you discover that there is a sister lesbian bar around the corner named Sue Ellen’s that you realise the absolute genius at play! 

You see, Sue Ellen was the name of JR.’s wife on Dallas!

QUEER WORD
FAQs

What are the funniest gay bar names?

Some of the funniest real gay bar names include Manhandler, Manhole, Pecker’s, The Beaver, lüb, and R7 — all brilliant, all ridiculous.

Are these gay bar names real?

Yes — these were all genuine real-life venues or notable queer-adjacent spots, many of which were well-known local institutions.

Why do gay bars have funny names?

Because queer culture loves wordplay, innuendo, camp humour, and in-jokes — and a bar name is basically a billboard for vibes.