QUEER WORD
G0Y

What it means:

g0y (that’s g-zero-y) is a self-described identity for men who are romantically and/or sexually attracted to other men but reject the label ‘gay’ and disassociate themselves from mainstream gay culture.

Many g0ys embrace forms of same-sex affection and sexual intimacy (including kissing, caressing, and even oral sex) while drawing the line at anal sex and rejecting anything they view as ‘effeminate.’

Let's Use It In A Sentence:

The g0y guy might grind gorgeous gentlemen greedily, but he guarantees he’s not gay.

Before We Begin...

This one might ruffle a few feathers - and I’ll readily admit upfront, I’m probably not the most impartial narrator. But I’m here to learn, not just snark, so I will try my darndest to reel it in.

A Bit of Background: Where Did g0y Come From?

The term g0y first appeared in the early 2000s, born from a group of men who felt alienated by stereotypical portrayals of gay life.

They believed that traditional gay culture didn’t reflect their values or experiences, and sought to carve out a new identity - one that allowed emotional and sexual intimacy between men without embracing the full ‘gay lifestyle.’

I know, right? ‘Gay lifestyle’. Sheesh.

And yes, they really do spell it with a zero instead of an “o”—presumably to symbolise difference, rebellion, or maybe just because all the good usernames were already taken.

So, What Do g0ys Actually Do (and Not Do)?

G0ys describe themselves as practicing ‘fraternal bonding’ - a kind of emotionally intimate and sexually expressive connection that doesn’t include anal sex.

According to g0y forums and websites, the list of acceptable behaviours includes:

✔️ Hugging
✔️ Kissing (on the lips, no less!)
✔️ Frottage
✔️ Mutual masturbation
✔️ Oral sex

But anal sex?

No, no, no.

Too ‘gay.’ Too ‘violent.’ Too much.

Where It Gets Complicated

Look, we all have the right to define our own identities. And I want to be clear: I’m not trying to invalidate anyone’s sense of self.

But... I have some big questions.

Because this isn’t just about preference - it seems to be defining yourself based on rejection. Of femininity. Of queerness. Of the LGBTQ+ rights movement.

Many g0ys openly describe themselves as ‘masculinist’, distancing themselves from anything coded as feminine or politically queer. And that starts to sound a lot like internalised homophobia... with snappy new branding.

Wait, They Have a Flag?

Oh yes, there’s a g0y flag.

Because what’s a fringe sexual identity without a little graphic design?

It’s grey, black, and white - sharp lines, no pink in sight. Probably wouldn’t catch them waving a rainbow.

So What’s the Deal: Identity or Denial?

That’s the tension, isn’t it?

For some, g0y is a way to express same-sex intimacy without assuming a queer political or social identity.

For others, it’s a way to benefit from queer relationships while rejecting the community that made those freedoms possible.

Either way, it feels icky and complicated to me.

Final Thoughts

Whether you see g0y as a legitimate identity, a rebranding of internalised homophobia, or something else entirely, one thing is clear: labels are powerful.

They shape how we see ourselves, and how we’re seen by others.

And as much as the g0y movement might want to keep itself separate from queerness... well...

👉 kissing, cuddling, and going down on men while saying “no homo” still feels pretty queer to me.